Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Parental Advisory!

This is a fun little "radio" ad that I wrote.  It does not represent my actual desire(s). I just tried to be as funny/outrageous as I could be while inventing a sex toy ;). (I wrote this in 2012)

A NEW CLASS OF SEX TOYS.

                (Audio only)
                [Our scene opens with the sounds of a woman’s voice pleasuring herself, after she finishes. . . ]
                Voice of a teletubby: Again, again!/Yay!/Uh-oh!
                Announcer: How often have you gotten bored with a personal pleasure toy?  Those of you with enough money may have even bought a life size doll.  However, these can only be satisfying for so long.  We always long for more.  You may start watching Adult videos while pleasuring yourself, you might buy a better doll that caters to your particular fetish, or you may really need something different and begin to consider pushing your comfort zones.  But wait, we have a better solution!, that’s right!  We here at Wockerjab have come up with a new product that’s sure to please everyone. From the same company that brought you the Mr. Snuffleupagus dildo and Barney, the purple dinosaur, bangs Baby Bop: Let’s learn about sex.  If you are like us you have often wished that you could keep your attention on your life-size doll while also watching an adult video.  Now you can! That’s right we heard your pleas and after much careful thought your prayers have been answered!
                We at Wockyjab are proad to announce the first ever teletubbie pleasure doll.  You just put the dvd in their rear (or their mouth if it’s a video) and watch any adult video of your choice. Plus, because teletubbies aren’t really human they have more holes than your average doll.  Your dreams of having a teletubbie pleasure doll have been answered.  Like you, many of us have dreamed of having a teletubbie doll to have some adult fun with.  Now I know what you are saying, “but WockerJab, I’m a female I wouldn’t enjoy such a doll.” In anticipation of this we have developed an all new Teletubbie who has different sized bulges all over him, we call him DickyWang. 
                And that’s not all if you’re gay we have TInkyWinky the original gay pride teletubbie.  These things are selling like hotcakes so call now! (stage whisper) Have the phones started ringing yet?

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